6 keys to Beat Self-Sabotage and Meet Goals

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Key Tips to keys to Beat Self-Sabotage

Many of the difficulties we encounter in life are obstacles that we put on ourselves.

All people throughout their lives have tried at some point to bring about a change in their lives. This change can be personal, like quitting smoking, or professional, like working for a promotion.

However, it is a fact that changes cause fear and that the fear of leaving our comfort zone can lead us to shorten our attempts at success.

Avoiding these attempts is not easy, but throughout this article, you'll find several keys to combat self-sabotage.

Why does self-sabotage appear?

There are innumerable reasons why people end up interfering, more or less unconsciously, on their way to success or toward the achievement of any goal or objective.

In general, the reasons why this usually happens are related to self-concept. That is, with the opinion that the person has about himself.

This opinion originates and is formed throughout life, so changing it is complicated, but not impossible.

This self-concept is configured from the first years of a person's life. For this reason, it is essential that during childhood the child receives messages of support and security since the opinion that is formed about his ability at that moment will accompany him practically for the rest of his life.

There are hundreds of ways to sabotage yourself, from small, almost unconscious behaviors to significant behaviors where the person knows in advance that he is thwarting their attempts to achieve something.

Some of the most recognizable manifestations that a person is sabotaging themselves are:

  • Putting the lack of time as an excuse for not doing what you would like scares you.
  • Continually placing less relevant tasks or less feared consequences.
  • Replace immediate reward behaviors to avoid facing the problem.

How to fight against self-sabotage?

As mentioned above, the first step in combating self-sabotage is for the person to recognize that there is a set of unhealthy beliefs within them that are sabotaging their attempts to progress.

Likewise, it is necessary to be aware that, although there are hundreds of circumstances that can condition our successes or failures, the person himself is responsible for his decisions and, above all, for those decisions that end up becoming self-sabotage.

Once these beliefs are recognized and with the proper motivation to change them, the person can already begin to carry out a series of good habits that prevent them from falling into self-sabotage. Some of these habits are:

1. Be convinced that it is possible

As discussed throughout the article, beliefs about ourselves determine our perception of everything we do.

In this way, if we believe in advance that we are not going to achieve something or we believe that we are not going to be up to the task, it will surely end up happening.

Therefore, the first step to avoid self-sabotage is to start changing our beliefs and, little by little, believe that we can achieve them.

2. Work on motivation

Most of the time, people are unable to achieve their projects or aspirations because they do not have the necessary techniques or skills to work and develop their motivation.

So many great intentions or great ideas don't come to light simply because motivation and commitment have diminished along the way.

3. Go slow

No matter how motivated a person is to undertake a project, if they do it with great intensity or try to achieve big goals, it is very likely that they will tire more easily, or even experience feelings of frustration for not being able to achieve them.

Taking into account that great things are not achieved in a short time, the best option to achieve a great goal is to break it down into smaller and more accessible objectives.

Likewise, these small objectives have the advantage of increasing our effectiveness and changing our self-concept, causing the negative beliefs we have about ourselves to change for the better.

4. Be aware that it will not be an easy path

Knowing that both the road we have to travel and the changes in our lives that this may entail will not be easy, prepares us to be able to face them more effectively.

The changes imply leaving our comfort zone and facing new unknown situations, therefore, if we are aware of this discomfort and we mentalize ourselves to remain firm despite it, we will find ourselves much closer to success.

5. Find a balance

One of the most effective techniques when dealing with major changes in our lives is to try to maintain mental, physical, and emotional stability.

If we manage to maintain the balance in these three planes, we will feel much calmer and we will eliminate possible interferences that could alter the development of our projects.

It is true that this cannot be achieved overnight, but with effort and tenacity, we can achieve it. If our mind is in order, if we provide energy to our body and if we maintain emotional stability, achieving our goals will be much easier and lighter.

6. Be aware of external influences

Our social environment, family environment, and friends can exert a great influence on us, and that does not always have to be a good thing.

On many occasions, our attempts to change or achieve an objective do not materialize because our environment limits them.

For example, a person who wants to quit smoking will find it much more difficult to quit if someone in one of their settings, such as work or friends, is smoking.

In this way, if we know what those limitations or obstacles that we may encounter are, it will be much easier to overcome them. A good way to integrate them is to make a list of the possible obstacles that we can find on the way.

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